LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION

Gypsies, tramps, and thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us gypsies, tramps, and thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

FCBFCSA 2 Brentford (Hey Jude) 0

at Old Elizabethans FC, Gypsy Corner, Mays Lane, Arkley

Saturday August 23rd 2008 ; Kick Off 10:45am - sunshine

One of the many problems a parklife football manager faces, is that annual task of finding a pitch with goals up at the start of the season, and the end of the season. Local authorities for one reason or another are reluctant to acknowledge that football is an all year sport these days.

With Barnet, and Brent unable to supply a pitch it looked liked the game was in jepoardy at the end of the week. FCBFCSA were lucky that goalkeeper David Kirby is also the secretary of Old Elizabethans FC, and we were able to secure use of one of their fine pitches for the game. It is a relationship that is set to continue. Away teams will be thrilled to be able to use the best showers in the local area.

Its not the easiest place to find, a sharp turn off Mays Lane, near Arkley, and FCBFCSA were amazed to find Brentford having arrived before Barnet just before 10am.

On hearing that the tv cameras were visiting for the game, FCBFCSA had no trouble getting a team out for this one, despite the absence of the three mustgetbeers Fenton, Harrison, and Barney, at Keith Squibb's stag do, and Ramos, Richards, and Taylor at the Reading festival. Indeed, the team had to turn away Keith Doe, and Niall Ward, as the squad was bulging.

The match was set to be filmed for the Gloryhunter on ITV1's The Championship programme. Relax, ITV have not stooped to screening supporters games, after their catastrophic ITV digital experiment a few years ago. This feature follows a Tottenham supporter Spencer Austin who picked Grimbsy out of the hat, and watched them until they were beaten by Brentford, who he will follow until they get beaten and so on.

He approached Nicholas Galley, the Brentford manager for a game , and brought his trusty video camera along. It may just be a coincidence, but Superdrug, and Boots , in Barnet ran out of hairgel, and fake sun tan lotion three days before the match.

Whether or not it was playing up to the cameras, both teams were led through a series of warm up exercises. Andy Taylor, led Barnet's drills. Silvio Gradoni, bowed out of the one that looked like Adam Ant's Prince Charming video. His aging legs needed a longer stretch. Robin Goldman alway's seems to be warming up the goalie on such occasions.

Anyway the game was delayed slightly by the failure of the referee to turn up at the appointed time. Simon Brown stepped into the void, and Tudor 'Ponytail' Powell volunteered to be linesman.

It was a tight game scorewise, though Barnet seemed to have the edge overall. Barnet played some lovely passing football, and were assured with a strong defensive pairing of Currell, and Williamson, with Taylor, and Manzi maurading up the flanks. Sav Alavi, covered every blade of grass, and Gradoni used his intelligence to snuff out a chance when the defence was caught square on one occasion.

For all Barnet's possession , they missed the clinical finishing up front.

The goal eventually came with a fine lofted header over the vocal Brentford goalkeeper from Demos Demetriou, his second goal in four games in a FCBFCSA shirt. He was warned about his celebration somersault afterwards. The IFA is not insured, and players play at their own risk.

It was amazing that Demetriou had got back in the zone for the match, after a bizarre pre match debate with Simon Sav Alavi, about Jade Goody.

Barnet's second came from a long range effort from Hendon U21 starlet Jake Manzi. He said that he 'loved' playing against Brentford, as he had scored a similar effort last season. Karl Bates almost added a third with a fine volley.

Brentford would have pulled one back , but former Borehamwood keeper David Kirby was alert to it, and pulled off a fine acrobatic save. Its good having a former semi professional keeper between the sticks at this level.

Simon Brown had a fine half in his refereeing debut, despite the constant haranguing of the Brentford number 10. So much so, that when the referee Joshua Mattocks arrived, he was told he was not needed. It saved the team over a score.Indeed the black Barnet shirt, does have another use. It looks very smart, as emergency refereeing attire.

At half time , the team were playing so well, and seemed so in control that Gerry Currell did not need to deliver his familiar rallying cry. It was decided that with the score still two - nil, substitutions would be delayed until the game was safer.

Brentford took over refereeing duties in the second half. Almost immediately, it seemed as though the decision to send the referee off, was wrong. Pat Nally was fouled by the Brentford number 10. A couple of minutes later the roles were reversed. The Brentford number 10 retaliated, and there were handbags for a while. A few other players stepped in to break it up, and the referee finally blew his whistle. After a brief stand off it was soon forgotten.

This was very much an isolated incident, in a well spirited match. The only bickering seemed to be inhouse between regulars in Brentford's saturday team, and their sunday team.

Barnet thought they had scored a third with a fine finish from Craig Clayton. However, it was correctly ruled out for handball in the area.

On 70m the first change was made. Josh Stanton, came on at right wing for Pat Nally, and Sav Alavi moved inside.

On 75m, a tiring Craig Clayton was replaced on the left wing by debutant Samuel Norris. A few moments before Craig showed great vision and execution by playing a long crossfield ball that landed at the feet of Andy Taylor.

Soon after the gloryhunter was free on goal having beaten David Kirby. Miraculously Pete Williamson recovered all the lost ground and cleared off the line. The teams went to check whether this was caught on camera. He had left the damn thing switched off. It really was a great bit of defending that Alan Hansen would have been gushing over, had it been screened by BBC on Match of the Day.

For the gloryhunters report please visit

http://www.itv.com/sport/football/thegloryhunter/default.html

 

A few moments later Williamson signalled to the bench that he was carrying a knock, and was replaced by Simon Brown, with Karl Bates dropping back to partner Gerry Currell. He slotted in perfectly.

The biggest concern was losing Silvio Gradoni's prized Adidas Tango matchball albeit temporarily. Keep an eye out on ebay for these gems, but don't outbid us. He reports that Luca Gradoni's football ability has come on over the summer, and he will be pushing for a place in the team in the next decade. What odds on the evergreen Gradoni, playing alongside his son ?

With 10 minutes on the clock Tudor Powell replaced Andy Taylor at right back. Taylor finally succumbing to injury after a barnstorming display.

Tank had been prowling the touchline all game looking like a little boy at Christmas, dressed head to toe in Barnet's new black kit. Barnet FC missed a trick at the community day when Danny Hart modelled the kit. Tank would have done it for a nice steak meal at the Queens. He wants it to be known that he is available to do the honours next season. He can be contacted at FCBFCSA select models.

Anyway he came on for Demos Demetriou, who enthused about his goal. Tank gets better with age, and linked up well with Brown, in a different looking front line. There were opportunities for both late on, as well as Sav Alavi, and Sam Norris, but Barnet couldn't convert.

A fine performance by FCBFCSA, which poses selection headaches for the manager should all be available one day.

Barnet lined up

                                       1.Kirby

2. Taylor          4.  Currell (c)    5. Williamson     3. Manzi

7. Clark          6.  Alavi          10.  Gradoni        11. Clayton

                      9. Bates           8.   Demetriou

12. Stanton 13. Goldman 14. Norris 15. Powell 16. Brown

man of the match - Jake Manzi. The quote of the day came from Craig Clayton at half time, who said "I know its strange to say, but Jake is bossing the game .... from left back " !

Thanks to Nicholas, and Brentford for coming and giving us FCBFCSA a great game. Hopefully, we can visit their manor later on in the season.

Silky Sav

During the main match at Underhill later on the ball went into the crowd. In an instant Simon Sav Alavi, flick it with the side of his foot, over his head and onto the pitch.It drew a round of applause from the East Terrace, and gushing praise from Steve Percy (former FCBFCSA stalwart from the 60s to the 80s !) who said "I've seen more skill from you in the last 10 seconds, than from this mob all season".